31/July/2010
Today's observation: I have only just discovered that the diarrhoea song actually goes "it's hot and it's runny and it's not very funny." For all my life it was "and it's very very funny." Kind of explains a lot about myself.
Today's lingual observation: Man, what's up with the word diarrhoea? It's already an awkward word, but the British spelling adds that totally superfluous O that just makes it look even more repulsive.
Today's less amusing observation: Just when I think I can't hate the internet more than I do already do...
... forums start adopting BS like this. What purpose does it serve besides to escalate my hatred of everything?
27/July/2010
Haven't been up to much at all lately, I'm afraid. Life is mildly busy - mildly busy in the sense that I have stuff to do, even though said stuff is not exactly interesting, productive or even worth bothering with, but I guess just doing it is better than raising a stink about the issue. I suppose saying life is mildly boring would've been more accurate. My current events have been mildly boring. Perhaps on the verge of moderately boring!
I've been trying to occupy myself with something, but I guess I'm mildly frustrated as well! (actually closer to just a trifle frustrated but let's not start that again) I've got a bunch of things I want to do regarding the site, but I seem incapable of writing content when I just look at the pages and think, man, they're pretty ugly. I don't know if that's just me suddenly acquiring an even greater lack of self-confidence about my own work, or I really legitimately have been blind to their ugliness for so long. Even after being reminded of all the stressful reasons that prompted me to temporarily avoid working on the Bomberman Shrine Place, I was quite tempted to begin some small progress on it once more... up until I saw it and forgot just how haphazardly I have it all laid out, both in how the directories and files are stored and not just the presentation.
A few of the other sites I would like to redesign, some just to pump a bit of life into them, some just because I can hardly imagine updating them with the totally hideous file management they currently have. I've sketched out a few ideas, some more ambitious than others, but I guess it's just a matter of uncertainty. I like redesigns simply because I get to dabble in presentation skills, but it also means having to make sure all the links work and everything flows fine, and it requires the readers to get adjusted to the new look - and none of those are particularly fun. I'm actually kinda surprised nobody's called me out on how terribly laid out the General Writings page. What kind of categorisation is that? If I had to describe it in one word, I'd call it turbo-shit.
And then there's oddballs like Oh! My God!! Why'd They Change That? which are kinda essential just so some of the important information has a place to stay (people gonna be pissed if their precious Super Princess Peach Koopaling GIFs vanished!), but I keep thinking it would just make more sense to make small shrines to the important games and include that info there, while also giving me the space to include other related titbits (it'd be pretty neat to make some Super Princess Peach maps, and any opportunity to highlight how rad 3D Movie Maker is is fine by me!). Mind you, it wouldn't take much effort to revamp the whole place and it could act as an excuse to practise some CSS, but for every semi-decent page like Ardy Lightfoot and 3D Movie Maker, there's like forty other pages that are kinda boring and meaningless. Was anyone interested in reading about early footage of Mario Party Advance? Besides, there's shitholes like X-CulT where I can dump boring stuff like that.
My main reason to revamp it was so I could exclude RQ87's pages and he could toss them onto his site, but I think even he agreed that a lot of the content there is kinda half-hearted. I'd be quite happy just dumping the section entirely and reserving some of the content for potential shrines, as that would tie into my plan to integrate more game pages into Random Hoo Haas, but I'm kinda incapable of making decisions without chatting it over with total strangers. Tell me your thoughts! (or you can ignore this and wait until another movie review crops up. I never mentioned I watched The Incredibles and Romancing The Stone, did I?)
Today's observation: Does the postman just not bother coming on Tuesdays anymore? It seems on every Tuesday for the past few weeks I've been waiting for a parcel to arrive, only for no post to be delivered at all until the next day. It is mildly inconvenient!
19/July/2010
Long-time homebrew Sert (who you've probably seen referred to as Aodhán on the site because referring to people by their real names apparently isn't hip these days) has set up yet another blog, Dual Screens and Caffeine Dreams. He's precisely the kind of guy who I'd love to hype... if he actually had a site that didn't become dormant within five minutes and then gradually vanish off the face of the internet. It's had three entries within two days, so here's hoping it'll work this time! I'd consider him my mentor in the realm of humour and quirky choice of video games, though I clearly went in the direction of vulgarity and bad taste while Sert still maintains an aura of decency. Keep on rockin', buddy.
On the subject of quirky video games, remember when I actually talked about games I was currently playing on the blog? And then I thought, why bother, because I'll eventually write up about it for Games I Own? And then that section became dangerously outdated and cumbersomely managed and it's only if you browse the Flying Omelette forums that you keep track of what games I'm playing at the minute? Yeah, whatever happened to that?
I just finished playing Call of Cthulhu: Dark Corners of the Earth today, after starting it about four weeks ago. I started it at my dad's request, but it's definitely a game I was interested in trying anyway. It's a first-person adventure where the emphasis on more on exploration, solving puzzles and investigating mysteries, though there is a small amount of shooting dudes involved. Basically the main character spends about six years in a mental asylum after encountering the Yith, and afterwards is out and about investigating Innsmouth, where a small-town robbery eventually escalates into a conspiracy that the citizens of the town are actually freaky fishmen who want to resurrect the gods of the Deep Ones. It's a genuinely compelling story, and it's amazing to look back at it and see just how far the characters go, from moseying around small town alleyways to storming an old refinery, culminating in visiting the underwater headquarters of the Deep Ones. I've no doubt said before that I never really give a hoot about stories in video games, but hot damn, this is a good one. Ending's a little nonsensical, but given the closest experience I have with the original mythos is that one episode of The Real Ghostbusters, that's to be expected.
The game's pretty buggy, though. There were only two instances where it's game-breaking, though - once early in the game if you forget to pick up a book before the house is sealed off (easily rectified with a walkthrough!), and again late in the game on the boat where if you save at the wrong time the game just freezes every time you leave the save room. It can be avoided by just keeping a few spare saves of the early parts of that segment, but still, it's not cool that it exists at all. There's other minor bugs like journals from one save file being carried over to the next one you load, how you can reload your gun endlessly despite having a full magazine and not losing bullets, and a lot of the hot spots for using items are kinda finicky, but despite the slightly unfinished vibe about the game, I'd definitely recommend it if you like your atmospheric adventures.
Honest to god, though, it could've done with a bit of contrast. Or at least a flashlight.
What game allows you to slowly blast a jeep to death solely by running after it with a hunting rifle?
Damn right it's Turok: Dinosaur Hunter!
Turok is one of those strange games we've had since we got the Nintendo 64, none of us ever really knew what to make of it, and ultimately it would just boil down to using cheat codes so we could blow everything up with the chronoseptor. I think I was lucky once to get past the first level, but it's a game of vaguely-defined goals and directions, where your character's vision is permanently shrouded with a dense bubble of mist, and falling to your death is one of those casual facts of life, like blinking.
Using my newly-gained DVI cable I've been playing the PC version on the TV with a USB gamepad, and it is crazy amounts of fun. The music doesn't play and the auto-map isn't functioning, but it doesn't stop the game from being surprisingly compelling. There's something lovingly raw and old-fashioned about the game; your only objective is just to get keys, and that's it, you're left to your own devices. There's no hints, no help, and if you missed one key, well, you'll just have to start the level and look through it all over again. Despite the rather outlandish setting and the fact you're toting around giant pulse cannons on your back, it's probably the closest I've seen an FPS to being like a man lost in the wilderness with only his wits and some huge-ass guns to defend himself.
I admit I've been very boring and just used the pistol almost the entire time. I have no reason to use the bow except on the big green dudes (purlins, aren't they called?), the shotgun hasn't got enough ammo for me to feel comfortable with it, and, let's face it, using a pulse cannon on a dinosaur from several million years ago seems just a little bit unfair. What have I become? In the old days I'd be swapping weapons like every two seconds so corpses would be littered with all manner of variable shotholes; I think my favourite choice was the grenade launcher, where I could continuously blast corpses around like ragdolls. But nope, I'm just sticking with the pistol.
I'm a very boring person, aren't I?
18/July/2010
Random Hoo Haas has a second volume of unfinished works up. If anyone actually has the patience to finish reading any of them, let me know!
Nothing terribly spectacular to talk about on the internet lately. Well, okay, I went to Portrush a couple of days ago to see a friend perform in a play; I got myself a cable that allows me to view what's on my PC on the TV screen (time to start appreciating some gamepad-friendly PC games!); I bought myself a PSP with a really terrible selection of games; and I watched Q: The Winged Serpent, which was an enjoyable piece of schlock. I was disappointed that it offed Richard Roundtree in such a casual manner, though. I know he's meant to be playing the "bad" cop, but come on, that doesn't change the fact he's as cool as Samuel L. Jackson in a block of ice.
Today's observation: They're advertising ShamWow! on local television. That's kind of unexpected.
15/July/2010
It's been a couple of weeks since padre and I watched a movie, and I was hoping to start up the routine again with something like The Warriors. That plan couldn't go ahead when my Xbox refused to allow FTP transfers (of course the DVD is like, what, £3? an easily remedied problem if it weren't too late to bother going out and picking it up), so we just rummaged through DVDs for stuff that was under two hours, and Titan A.E. looked interesting. At least, the box made it look interesting. They really went out of their way to avoid emphasising it's a 2D animation by Don Bluth!
So Earth is blown the fuck up by a race of energy beings who are evil.
Why? Because. The kid's father (voiced by Ron Perlman!) began work on a
project that was basically to ensure mankind still had planet to call theirs,
and the kid (voiced unenthusiastically by Matt Damon) knows the directions to
it. Thus he, a generic love interest, a gruff military dude and three obnoxious
aliens set about trying to find it. Vivid demonstrations of the CGI budget and
painfully uninteresting antics ensue!
Yeah, sorry, but I was bored out of my wits during the film. I was aware it was
an animated film, but I wasn't aware Don Bluth was behind it. I respect the man
for his talent, but I'm afraid An American Tail was his only flick that
still stands out to me (though considering the only other movie
of his I'd seen before was A Troll In Central Park, I clearly haven't
seen his better works), plus his trademark abundantly adorable style just
gets a bit tiresome after a while. I don't think it helped that the movie just
didn't know what audience it was aiming for - the earth being blown to freakin'
smithereens with lots of ships full of passengers being seen demolished in the
shockwave is not exactly how one imagines a children's film starting off, but
we're then treated to lots of zany alien characters with googly eyes, obnoxious
voices and sarcastic comments.
I was almost hoping that it would aim for a slightly more mature vibe, but if
there was one I just didn't feel it. Mature isn't just looking dark and having a
few deaths, it's about having interesting characters, a compelling plot and
actually giving me a reason to keep watching and not just turn it off in favour
of watching some Beast Wars. I didn't like any of the characters either
because they were boring or because they were grating to listen to, and the only
mildly appealing character was the alien kangaroo girl, and only because she
actually demonstrated she could kick ass and didn't bludgeon us over the head
with how wacky and zany she was. The humans' constant complaints about living
with aliens and having to adapt to their lifestyle didn't come across as a
yearning for a less foreign home to live in, but more them being pissy that they
were now the universe's equivalent of a minority (also it's not
until just before the third act that you see anyone who isn't a whitey. Great
representation of our kind, fellas! Also I won't believe you if you try to
convince me Drew Barrymore's cardboard cutout of a character is meant to be
asian).
Dad and I were constantly asking each other our opinions so far, and I bluntly
admitted I wasn't impressed. The characters didn't interest me, the humour was
obnoxious, but he basically took the words out of my mouth by saying the story
was crap. Yeah, it was. I guess the basic concept isn't bad, but I'm sorry, the
entire story just did not appeal to me one bit. Its pacing was all over the
place and felt more like several episodes of a Saturday morning cartoon spliced
together; it barely even felt like the story bothered even trying to hide how it
was going through the motions. The military dude just seems to show up at the
beginning and wastes no time in saying "hello let me drive the plot for you" by
making the ridiculous life-or-death save-the-world offer. It just seemed to come
out of nowhere, and rather than the character reacting to how out-of-the-blue it
comes, he just seems to follow along with the traditional "I'm a nobody why
would I want to do that" spiel. There's no real breather space to let the story
sink in or actually sound good for a few seconds, it just seems to cut to all
kinds of locations and scenarios that bear little to no significance on the
story. I'm still trying to figure out why whats-her-face was jettisoned to the
marketplace and what bearing it had on the story outside of padding. I will
commend it for giving the film's one good joke: "An intelligent guard. Didn't
see that one coming."
The film does pick up a little in its last act, but even its very minor
improvement couldn't save the film. And as an animation, it left something to be
desired. I won't deny it's certainly better than your
standard animation, but
it struggles to come across as exciting or appealing, and the gimmick of having
2D characters in 3D environments just doesn't mesh too well (though, again, it's
certainly been done worse).
It doesn't help that the 3D just isn't that consistent - quite often the
framerate is low and choppy, like a computer is chugging on trying to process
it, while other times it's silky smooth. There are some instances where you have
a smooth-running spaceship drift across a jittery animated backdrop, which does
wonders for ruining any sense of being immersed I might've been feeling. I can't
remember any discussion about the movie when it was new so I've no idea if
people were actually impressed by it or not, but I admit it does look like
something that could be easily replicated on a modern cartoon show with a
moderate budget.
I will say, though, some of the backdrops are genuinely beautiful. I'm not exaggerating! As much as the film bored and annoyed me and I vocally protested when the film was just showing off their special effects to fill time (nope, sorry, the whole space stingray thing was just a waste of time), some scenes and images really were wonders to look at. The planet of hydrogen trees, although much of it consisted simply of glowing orbs, the long distance shots looked absolutely fabulous. The ice ring sequence was actually an alright action scene, not to mention it was some of the best CGI in the whole film, and a lot of the one-off painted scenes (New Bangkok and so on) looked fantastic, almost reminding me of Heavy Metal in the amount of detail layered onto them. It's a pity the film wasn't just an animated space documentary, in which case we could've had some great scenery shots.
In a way it's neat to finally see it, but, sorry, I thought it stunk. It takes a lot for me to actually say a movie is bad, especially when it's not even that long, but I was literally counting the minutes until it was over. TVtropes tells me that there were some books of the movie which both adapt and expand the story, which I guess would be worth checking out if I felt like bludgeoning myself to death with one, but it's almost sad seeing how enthusiastic the people there are about the movie, citing so many scenes as being "crowning moments of awesome" in their lingo that I personally thought were a bit shit. I mean, the creation of New Earth should have been an event worthy of the legitimate usage of the term "epic," but instead came off as a bit rushed. Also crowning music of awesome? I thought the music was really, really downplayed the whole time.
I should've just stuck with The Warriors.
13/July/2010
I actually meant to get talking about Bomberman: Act Zero, like, the very day after that last blog entry, but I continue to astound myself with my overpowering sense of laziness. Has it seriously been nearly a week since my birthday? This entry, for instance, I'm trying to sit down and write it but I apparently just decided, hey, let's read some of my older entries. Why? I don't know, I just did, and it took me a few minutes to remember what I opened the file for in the first place.
And that reminds me, there's clothes in the washing machine that have been unattended to since this morning. See? That's the kind of absent-minded laziness I am so easily prone to. It sickens me.
But really, what is there to say about Bomberman: Act Zero? Well, in a nutshell, it's unremarkable. The game is virtually identical to Wario Blast, except without a ridiculous crossover to give it attention - the selection of items don't extend beyond the usual fire, bomb, speed up, penetration and remote control bombs; there are no steeds to ride, and there are actually no options you can change at all in single-player mode. You can't change the difficulty, the time limit, or even choose what stage you want to start on. Every time you start, you're back at the beginning. You've got to play all ninety nine levels from start to finish in one sitting, without dying once. To describe it as barebones would be like saying Orson Welles only bore a slight resemblance to a giant bearded oval.
The game does have a mild saving grace - the First Person Battle mode, which despite the name is still in third-person. Rather than viewing the whole arena, you rotate and zoom the camera around your Bomberman, forcing you to track down your opponents with a limited field of vision. To prevent this from being a recipe for cheap unforeseen deaths, you're given a health bar - being scratched with a flame does minimal damage, but standing in it for long times will obviously mess you up something fierce, not to mention your power-ups get stripped away with the more damage you take. It's actually kinda interesting and also lessens the blow of the game's awkward quirks regarding the bombs; the game is nice enough to include a little bit of variety throughout the single-player mode (judging by the one mild mix-up I saw in the twelve stages I played), but it's still something that's going to get very monotonous even to the most patient of individuals.
However, it genuinely is the presentation that makes the game so irritating. When I last played the game I had a headache afterwards from just thirty minutes of it, and I blame it on the sound. Dear lord, the noise. The music is like someone raided raided the instruments from the F-Zero GX soundtrack and decided to bang them all together like tambourines. It's not so much music as it is just a generic grunge-like cacophony. Also, instead of the traditional squealing Japanese voice struggling to pronounce "Fire Up" without access to an R sound like the series normally has, we get a generic female computer voice that speaks in a very grating manner. There's barely any variety in what it says, and even after just twelve stages I was sick to the teeth of hearing "you're alive. Get to the next stage." When I inevitably go round the fucking bend and enter a state of unrestrained madness you know I'll be plastering that all over the site. Just a head's up.
The graphics don't really offend me, though. They're not very inspiring, though. You'd expect some even mildly decent visuals from a full price Xbox 360 game (they didn't even have the courtesy to release it as a budget title, never mind a downloadable game!), or at least a touch of diversity, but... no, the one arena you see is the one you'll be seeing for the whole game. I think that's my biggest complaint about the game - I can live with it being shallow and cumbersome (what Bomberman game isn't?), but the fact they redesigned the character and gave it an entirely new vibe, and then squandered it by not doing anything new. There's no point lying about the story because it's pretty dumb-sounding, but if they'd been willing to make a proper adventure game out of this that broke the mould of a traditional Bomberman game, then, hell, they could've had something interesting! But no, it's just the same old stuff in a different package. It's totally wasteful.
I will say that the character designs are kinda creepy. Its basic elements of glowing parts and a giant claw are cool, but it's the finer details that weird me out, such as the fact their hands are chained to their waists, their claw is attached to their spine via a tube, and the females are like some bizarre adventure in creepy techno fetish art. Despite being freakin' robots, the females have high heels, stockings and bouncing breasts. One can question why they even have female robots to begin with, but it doesn't make it any less unsettling.
It's sad. On one hand, I feel a sense of mild relief to see the game on my shelf, knowing that I finally have it and didn't have to spend any of my own money on it (that's money that could go towards buying Japanese game guides I can't read!), but on the other, actually thinking of playing the game makes me cringe a little. Oh, Rage Quitter, what monstrosity have you foist upon me?!
Meanwhile, in the land of good games, my brother's been thinking a lot about indie games lately and I got trying out some I picked up ages ago. Legend of Princess is pretty freakin' kickass, and even as just one level I can't help but feel there was a serious amount of effort put into it. Kudos!
I will say the ending message bugged me, though. "Now go and play the real games," it says. Yeah, I would, if they played like this and weren't serious balls. It's kind of sad how one serious stinker like Twilight Princess can change my tone dramatically to the series.
07/July/2010
After over five weeks of avoiding responsibility, I finally made a characters and intro page for Cadillacs & Dinosaurs, as well as a comic comparison page which took longer than was necessary to make, but was a lot of fun. I hope reading about the show was close enough to the enjoyment I got from watching it!
Today's my birthday. I actually had no interest in talking about it, because, well, what is there to say? RQ87 made the event worthwhile by sending me a birthday present! I totally wasn't expecting this, but in hindsight, I guess I totally should've, it's like the one thing he leaps to when we begin discussing the series. Once I realised the package was from RQ I was in a bit of a giggle fit because AW SHUCKS SOMEBODY LIKES ME :), I totally had a big stupid smile on my face...
... even after I saw what it was. I won't deny my first words were "Walmsley, you malicious bastard," but I was still totally thrilled with the present. Seriously, thanks so much, man!
Yes, RQ bought me Bomberman: Act Zero. It's a game I'm simultaneously fascinated and insulted by, and we both knew that no matter how terrible it was, sooner or later I would have to cover it in detail for the Bomberman Shrine Place. It was a relief to know that I wouldn't have to spend any of my own money on it (though I would totally excuse him if he wanted repaid for it because jeez, I'd feel dirty for spending money on it), but it took me a good five hours before I had to courage to actually play it. I played it for half an hour in both offline modes and had to go for a walk afterwards to cleanse myself. So, how was it? ... well, I'll reserve my judgment for a future entry, let's leave it at that for now.
But honestly, I was genuinely chuffed with the gift. Thank you so very much, Rage Quitter! I'll most definitely have to see what I can get you in return. I'm doubtful I'd be able to surprise you the same way, especially when you have so many freakin' games and I'm barely acquainted with your DVD collection - you'll be a tricky customer to buy for!
I loved the Santa Claus wrapping paper, by the way.
06/July/2010
Today's observation: Brushing your teeth when you've got a hair in your mouth is up there in my list of truly disgusting experiences.
05/July/2010
I love old technology. I still believe old-timey cars are the handsomest automobiles that will ever exist, I much prefer the raw, non-streamlined look of old aircraft, and let's face it, I'd sooner take an ancient kettle just for its display value than a modern one that, y'know, doesn't blow up in your face if you leave it unattended.
I hate how hard it is to get rid of the stuff, though.
I have been seriously hoping to throw some crap up on eBay this Summer and simply engage in a bit of a clearout (I WELCOME ANY OFFER I SHIP WORLDWIDE JUST GET THIS SHIT OFF MY HANDS MAN), but I'm still kinda languishing in junk that hasn't shifted on Amazon for ages. I don't know where I got so many GameCube and PlayStation controllers, but would you believe I'm having trouble getting rid of them? It saddens me just seeing them sitting around with no one to get good use out of them. Okay, one of them's got a serious goo problem (the joystick is sticky as shit, it's like some kinda freaky fungus thing - don't worry, that one isn't up for sale!) and there's the simple matter of, hurf, who wants an old obsolete GameCube controller nowadays, but still. People still hold onto their old consoles nowadays, right? They don't burn them or anything. If they did that'd be a bit disappointing.
But at least old console accessories still have some market, with people left in the world who can still enjoy them and give them good homes. Does anyone still care for old-as-beans PC components? Because I just unearthed a bunch of old gamepads and flight sticks, and man, those aren't any good to me. Why on earth do I even have a flight stick, let alone four of the damn things? I've never had any flying simulators! Was it just customary for every PC user of the 20th century to have a flight stick handy just in case they ever wanted to simulate some flights?
What truly saddens me about this discovery... is this gamepad.
It is a beautiful gamepad. Can you believe it actually has six face buttons? When was the last time you saw a controller with six face buttons? My first answer would be the SEGA Saturn, but the Xbox had six face buttons (albeit stupidly laid out), and, uh, I guess the realm of USB gamepads is one I am unacquainted with, but they probably have some with six face buttons too. Fact remains that I feel having six buttons is pretty neat and I just love the look and feel of this controller. But, sadly, since my current computer is not old enough to drive, it doesn't have a game port and thus has no means of this controller connecting anywhere. I am mildly miffed!
Problem is, actually doing anything to fix this doesn't seem to be very fruitful. There are adaptors that allow you to plug them into USB slots, but none only are some of them frighteningly expensive (and at that price you might as well just seek out a USB pad to begin with) but apparently they're not terribly responsive regarding what inputs you make. So I was thinking, what would one have to do to actually turn the controller into a USB pad, removing the middleman that is the adaptor? Well, uh, search engines certainly aren't helpful. Apparently people think the laborious process of plugging in an adaptor is worthy of multi-step tutorials. Yeah, thanks, because I just wouldn't know what to do otherwise, fellas.
01/July/2010
Watched the last episode of Buffy the Vampire Slayer's first season. Not bad. Could've been worse. A bit ehhh, though.
The end of days are approaching! The Master will reawaken and summon the Hellmouth, and shit will go down! Drama bombs galore! Sad to say, none of those bombs actually work well. Willow is struck badly by seeing a bunch of dudes she knows killed by vampires, but her familiarity with them is entirely informed; no denying it would be a grisly sight, but it came across as rather tame for her to freak out over. Buffy gets all teenage mopey over the fact the prophecy says she has to die while fighting the Master, which is pretty understandable given the fact she reminds the audience she's only sixteen years old (sorry, I still don't believe it! Never in my life will I ever get used to casting adults as teenagers, it's just futile!), but I've never been too fussed on using teenage mood swings to direct the story in other directions - especially when it only serves to fill up like fifteen minutes of time for her moping. And, sorry, but Xander's an amusing guy, but I care not for his romance!
The climax left a fair amount to be desired. I mean, it wasn't dreadful, but it wasn't really satisfying. There's lots of drama surrounding the prophecy of Buffy's death, and then she comes back from the dead. And that's it, no real explanation. So, what, was the prophecy wrong? Was she not really dead? It doesn't make some statement about not every prophecy being right or going against destiny's desires, it's just, hey, a little CPR and she's back. Pretty weak. Also, I think the Master is awesome. That wonderfully gnarled accent! That guy could just read a phonebook and I'd still tune in to watch him, but I won't deny he's not exactly an entertaining character to witness in a fight, and his defeat is closer to putting an old dog out of its misery than destroying the ultimate evil. The Hellmouths did add a little extra excitement, but again, you can't deny they looked like dropouts from Little Shop of Horrors.
Pretty weak way to end the first series! I'd be interested to know if they knew they were getting a second series by that point or if it was still unknown, because if the entire series had ended like that, then, shit, that wouldn't be a good way to go.