Cramming it in before the new year, it's a new Metal Slug: Missing in Action update! The real meat and potatoes is the overhauled concept art coverage, now serving as an art gallery for each game and sporting translations for a number of pieces, revealing factoids English fans otherwise never knew about. Or at least, it's on a website now and not some long-buried forum post. It's also made me realise we've been calling Duke Koudou "Parker" because that's what Enomosiki called him all those years ago on the Metal Slug Database, and nobody's thought to question it. Hmph!
I've probably said it before, but I'd like to include more general purpose Metal Slug information in the future, like a characters page, vehicle information, mission walkthroughs and other factoids - and try my best to cite sources on everything! I'd actually wanted this to be the first baby step towards that with a characters page, but I'd rather have something presentable than another horribly unfinished page lying around. Sometime, maybe! Until then you can check out the Metal Slug Wiki and ignore like 80% of what it says. Gimlet's hobby certainly isn't farting, I can tell you that for free.
Here's a pile of stuff - so much stuff I'm going to bust out some bulletpoints! It's probably unnecessary, but what the heck!
The Legend of Zelda playthrough is finally finished! Well, I completed the game last year and only wrote a conclusion this week. I'm bad at being punctual.
Some Games I Played In 2015 is a thing. It's still unfinished, but I figured there's enough waffling in there to put it up early.
I dug up some unused graphics from SegaSonic Arcade. I also have no idea where you find this page. It's buried in General Writings somewhere, right?
Metal Slug: Missing in Action has some odds and sods, mostly for the first game.
And the Totally Bombastic Bomberman Shrine Place pretends it has an update because it'd feel sad if it were left out.
I feel like I've said this multiple times by now
(I last said it only six months ago!),
but ONM Remembered will be wrapping up in a few months, probably around March.
Only when it's nearing the end do I realise there was stuff I wanted to
highlight or topics I wanted an excuse to talk about! Ah well. It's not like I
have a blog where I can waffle about anything whenever I want.
I admit the schedule system is a double-edged sword - it's rewarding to know
I've got some form of content lined up for months ahead, but the unrelenting
nature of its output is probably tough for folks to keep up with; I know if I
weren't writing it I'd find it hard to keep up. I haven't
checked on GameWTFs in ages because it's like, crap,
I missed a month! That's gonna be a lot to catch up on! So rather than just
popping in now and then or working my way backwards or something, I put it off
until I have time to binge-read my way from where I left off to now... which
only gets more monumental with each missed update. Someday, I swear!
The thought of doing more scheduled blog content in future sounds nifty,
probably just a bi-weekly ramble on some topic or another. But that also sounds like hard work so
I wouldn't count on
it.
That's another thing - I meant to take a break from
the site this year! I though it'd do me good to just focus on new projects and
not worry about deadlines or pleasing an invisible audience... but then working on
new projects was just too weird and stressful when farting about with Bomberman
research is so much easier. I have bizarre comfort zones.
I always have stuff I'd like to be working on for the site: there's plenty of
Bomberman stuff I want to cover, which would also give me fodder for Random
Action Hour. There's some games I'd love to gush about; I'd like a hub for my
game
playthrough videos; I'm itching to give the place another makeover... but
I'd also like to make time for other crap I wanna do.
I'm pretty sure I said the exact same thing last year and nothing came of that,
but I like the illusion of giving myself options.
Until the next update!
A few small pokey updates for the Bomberman Shrine and Metal Slug: Missing in Action. Don't mind me, I'm just chucking up updates when I feel I've noodled long enough on something. I'm still otherwise farting about like I usually do!
Chucking up some game reviews because it's been a while since I've
used the blog for bloggin'! That and I forgot how bare some of the ONM
Remembered entries were. I finally began to highlight images without commentary
to spare myself the trouble and hope it'd give the image some time to be
appreciated... but it just looks like lazy content. Welp! The next couple of
weeks are a bit wordier, talking about topics that are probably only interesting
to me and nobody else. That's what you come here for, right?
... anyway, here's a rambly review.

A few years ago my brother was raving about Treasure Adventure Game, a
freeware indie 2D platform game that just ticked all his boxes: it had a huge
world to explore, all sorts of little details and activities to appreciate, a
day-night system that dictated each NPC's daily routine, and the simple thrill
of just riding around in a boat. It was darn-near his favourite game! I didn't
get into it at the time (because jeez, unskippable intros, what a
bore!), but I picked it up earlier this year to give it a look-see.
It's a game about adventuring for treasure, you might've gathered! You run,
jump, crawl and bash things with your hook hand in your quest to recover the
twelve legendary treasures that are required to open the temple hidden beneath a
museum, curated by your missing father's old adventure buddy.
You've got a big world to explore, and besides the help of a talking parrot,
you're pretty much left to your own devices. Go out there and see what you can
find! Sail around from island to island! Help people, solve puzzles, pick up
maps and tools, and maybe beat a boss once in a while.

It is a bit of a daunting game to get started with. There's a lot of
overworld out there, and not a lot you can do in it to start with! Unlike, say,
the multi-tiered castles of Castlevania, the world of Treasure
Adventure Game is pretty flat, and a lot of the game is spent just sailing
from left to right, from island to island.
It's not a big deal later on when you're better equipped and have a Magic Bottle
that allows you to fast-travel between checkpoints. But when the game begins and
you can barely interact with anything, you're sailing left or right hopelessly
trying to figure out, can I do anything on this island? What about the
next one? Because if not, it's gonna be a
long way to backtrack.
It might sound easy to define the game as a Metroidvania, but I'd dare say
that's misleading. You do get power-ups that grant you new abilities, sure, but
they're few and far between and often have far less impact than you'd hope. One
of the first acquisitions is the shovel, so I thought, terrific! That island
made entirely of sand is just begging to be dug up! And while that island does
hold a key to progressing further, the shovel sees very little usage outside of
unearthing coins and health items.
I kept holding out for an upgrade that'd make me feel more empowered... and
while you are more capable at the game's end than at the start, there's never
the instantaneous burst of satisfaction as when you get the Space Jump in
Super Metroid, for
instance.

Instead, what you should be holding out for is direction. Where's
a good place to explore, and how can I interact with it? Maps are commonly found
and offer coordinates to treasures or items, though your progress is partially
walled off at first with a tall cliff to the west and impassable tides to the
east, so you've only a few islands to traipse around... which is all fine and
well until you're hopelessly lost on what to do next. You can feel a bit starved
for direction at times, and although your parrot is meant to provide tips and
information, on the overworld it'll give you the same advice for the entirety of
the game: "go out and explore!" (most of its dungeons tips
consist of bad jokes and puns so it's not worth talking to at all, to be honest)
Exploring has its moments of satisfaction and its moments of head-thumping
frustration. For the longest time I was stumped on the jungle island with no
idea how to advance, until I finally stumbled upon the hooks I could grab onto
at the end of the vines. Due to the colour palette I could barely even see the
vines in the first place!
As you become more acquainted with the world you realise how so many areas have
no reason to be revisited, but there's no quick way of bypassing them. Thought
you'd missed something in a dungeon, or diving fruitlessly to the seabed? I hope
you like making your way all the back the way you came! It's actually easier to
just quit and reload your save sometimes.
It's a game that requires a bit of patience, let's put it like that. Once you
get into the swing of things making progress is (usually)
a snap, but if not, you're in for a rough ride. There's a
handy-dandy walkthrough that's well worth using, and is considerate enough
to mention what tools you need and even hides the in-depth stuff beneath spoiler
tags. It's very convenient and accessible, and a far better helping hand than
any of the NPCs!

I admit I usually like an objective in games to keep me on the right track,
so I probably get flustered with big sprawling worlds like this, while my
brother just loves looking around and getting invested.
There is real charm to exploring and seeing all the little towns and islands,
each with their own culture and inhabitants. There's a giant tree full of bugs
and mice living in harmony; a ghost town of partying spectres with a floating
graveyard above the castle; a subterranean culture of self-proclaimed genderless
insects; a big industrious city full of shops, private practises and midnight
raves and poetry slams. And, of course, there's your own little hometown of
quirky neighbours and tranquil island sensibilities.
It's quite charming on a surface level, though it's something the player probably embellishes more than the game itself does. NPCs might ask for your help with a crisis they're facing, and thank you when the job's done, but that's as far as their interaction goes. I'm probably so used to RPGs where townsfolk would react to in-game developments, but the guys in Treasure Adventure Game are a bit static by comparison. Once you've done your bit, you've done your bit. It's nice to walk through the places again, but you talk to them and realise they're exactly as you left them. Maybe that's a good thing?
On your quest you talk to folk and find journals from your dad that provide a
bit of backstory: the world was once one big continent until the three gods
warred and kerfuffled over it, I think, and there was some battle between a hero
and a demon and the continent got splintered into different parts, and the
twelve treasures the hero used-- something about if you get all the treasures
back then the bad demon guy returns?? I don't know, I wasn't paying attention!
There's a lot of wordage dedicated to it, and while on the micro scale it
provides some interesting context for the culture of each island, what lesson
they took from it and how it paints their view of the other races, I couldn't
really give a hoot about it as a story. It's presented to the player only as
infodumps from NPCs or excerpts from dusty old books, so it's got no bearing on
the player character until the very end when, surprise, they've got to resolve
it!

The game's tone is... I don't know what to make of it sometimes. It's an indie
game with an 8-bitty aesthetic and a very la-di-da attitude to trekking the
world in your pocket yacht, right in tune with your typical NES or SNES
adventure. You make friends with bugs and help people in need and do other
fluffy activities, but then there's moments that seem a bit at odds with that
light-hearted image. There's a few instances of swearing and an island of fungus
folk that involves the player getting mad high as a gameplay feature, but with
indie works I guess you're free to include whatever the heck you want.
There's implied gore, like blood on the spike traps in the temple beneath the
museum, but that's nothing new. Like, Ocarina of Time implied some
creepy-ass shenanigans with all the crap going on in the Dead Hand's chamber,
but that was more set dressing than anything - they let you, the
player, determine just how awful it is! But then there's a scene that just made
me plain ol' uneasy:
There's these comic relief pirates who hound you throughout the game, getting
into dopey boss battles to basically let you test out your new toys before
getting thumped or running away. The last time you encounter them they're
working for the big bad businessman and are piloting some Dr. Wily-esque machine
pod. Defeating them causes the pod to malfunction and crash through the
window...

... and that's what you see when entering the other room. Those guys are D-E-D
dead. There's blood everywhere! One of them's skewered on the broken
windshield, for crying out loud! The guys weren't nice, sure - they did spend
the whole game trying to kill a kid and working for a shady businessman - but it
seemed an unexpectedly callous way of disposing of them. An unexpectedly
mean-spirited act in a game that otherwise only got as bold as to have NPCs say
"people should go outside more often."
The backstory has plenty of implying about destruction and death, but they
didn't show a dopey pirate bleeding to death from a pane of glass through the
chest. Jeez, man. I was hung up on this scene for ages, and I kept thinking, is
just the end of them, or do they come back? There is an island full of ghosts,
after all - maybe they'll show up and be like, darn phooey, you beat us again!
But... no, as far as I can tell, they are gone from the story. They're freakin'
skewered. I don't know what to make of it, besides the fact I'm real squeamish
about the stupidest things.
And then there's the ending. My brother told me he actually had no interest
in completing the game; he'd acquired all twelve treasures, but he had such a
fun time simply sailing around and seeing the sights, he didn't care about the
conclusion. He bought the private island house for his character, saved his
progress inside, and never touched the game again.
I should've followed suit.
Instead I took the treasures to the temple as told, where you're given some
last-minute twist that the parrot was actually your dad, transformed by the
temple as punishment for cutting off your hand, and he sacrifices his life to
defeat his treacherous buddy who's also been corrupted by the temple's powers.
It doesn't add much, given how everyone's constantly saying how sketchy that guy
is, and the parrot is so useless it's hard to get invested in it as a character,
but no harm trying, I guess.
But it ain't over yet! It turns out the sneaky businessman is
actually the devil from the tales of olde! And you fight him by chasing him
through alternate dimensions... which includes backdrops from Super Mario
Bros., Kirby's Adventure and Castlevania. Complete with lifted
sprites that he uses to throw at you.

It... really undermines the whole thing. (that's a polite way of
describing it - my initial reaction was muttering "oh, fuck off")
When the game's done referencing its influences, you defeat the devil and he
announces he hasn't even unleashed his full power yet! He grows bigger and
stronger and nastier than before, only for a giant foot (who's
one of the gods you met earlier in the game) to step on him.
"I've been looking everywhere for you guys. Did I miss anything?"
Roll credits.
...
... so what happens after that? How does the world react to some random kid
helping defeat an ancient evil? I don't know, it never says! I only got 88% of
the items and got the so-called "bad end". Getting 100% apparently gives you a
joke ending where your grandma is kidnapped by ninjas and are you a bad enough
dude to find this funny.
I understand the notion of working so long and hard on something, yet you're eager to just have it done already (look at every half-baked project on this website!)... and it is your creation, after all. You're free to do whatever the heck you want or make it as irreverent as you please! But in cases like this, I feel like it disrespects the rest of the game to end on such a stupid anti-climax. It's dedicated so much wordage to the backstory and creating this world that tries to feel alive, and it undermines itself by having the devil chuck sprites of Kirby enemies at you before ending with a Monty Python gag. It gives me something to whinge about, that's the most I can credit it with.

Lacklustre ending that retroactively soiled a lot of goodwill I had about the
game's world and tone aside, the game has its charms! I'll confess a lot of it
is spent wandering aimlessly, and some of that wandering doesn't really pay off,
but I ultimately enjoyed my time with Treasure Adventure Game. For a one
man operation it's a densely-built little adventure game, with a surprising
amount of content and a lot to get invested in - my playthrough lasted me a
fortnight, and there were still a number of areas I never fully explored,
including what appeared to be a haunted outhouse.
It won't be everybody's cup of tea, and you can tell I had a whole heap of
quarrels with it, but it's good to play a game that feels like a legitimate
journey once in a while. It's currently being remade as
Treasure Adventure World,
and while I admit the art style doesn't do much for me (as
tiresome as itty-bitty pixels get, the ambiguity to shapes and details is a charm that's
hard to replicate when upscaled and redrawn), I'll probably chuck some
dough its way as thanks.
...
... okay, I still need to vent a bit about that ending.
That ending got me thinking about references in media. How much is too much?
When does it stop being a cute allusion and instead suggest the media has no
identity of its own? Treasure Adventure Game until that moment is
actually quite restrained. There's a mushroom called Gogondo who you're told "Gogondo
likes smoke". There's two mice called Mick and Jerry. Somebody quotes the
"meddling kids" line from Scooby Doo. They're tiny references in a game
that otherwise maintains its own little believable world.
I look at some other games, even big-name stuff, and it's off-putting how
they eschew having their own personality in favour of references, jokes and
homages. I like the looks of Guacamelee, but the sheer volume of posters,
murals and dialogue that's dedicated to referencing other game franchises as luchadors is... cute, if very groan-inducing.
I think the 'objective' of a game is the key, though - Treasure Adventure
Game is making a world for you to explore and a story that's supposed to get
you invested in exploring it. Guacamelee is a Metroid-y character
action game where you're either clobbering fools or finding where to go next.
It's got no time for world-building!
Y'all have probably heard enough about Undertale already
(I've got a bit of gushing about it in my upcoming Games I Played
in 2015 ramble so don't say I didn't warn you), but one thing I immensely
respected about it was how it stayed true to maintaining its own world. Sure,
there's general-purpose references to anime and video game tropes, and
Gaming.moe has a quick glance at its
likely influences in certain scenes, but it never just stops to
quote lines from Nintendo games or have a Goomba walk on screen or some crap. It
makes a world and it stays in that world.
Pal Codiekitty
joked on
Twitter how she was disappointed Papyrus never got to homage Garland of
Final Fantasy fame, and it's an amusing tweet, but it would've taken me out
of the experience had it happened in-game. There's nothing stopping him from
doing it - the game's monster world is no stranger to human entertainment, after
all - but I'm glad it skirted that line.
Likewise, it's disappointing to watch and read fan media for Undertale and see it
struggle to actually offer anything new - once the novelty of
Undertale Wrestling
wears off, all it can do is repeat the game's own jokes and make video game
references. When the game's writing is so fun and fresh to begin with, it's a
real bummer, y'know?
But I digress!
This old article on
Medium Difficulty speaks about Treasure Adventure Game's themes; it's
not terribly groundbreaking, but it's an adequate summary of the game's themes
of "capitalism sucks" and "going outside is rad". It also waxes poetic on this
jaunt into crossover city, how it's "building a relationship with its
inheritance", and I say, fuck off with that. You can almost guarantee any
8-bitty 2D indie platform game is going to homage its influences,
but I expected more of Treasure Adventure Game than to invite them
on-stage before the curtain's even dropped, for goodness sake.
The games industry is arguably still in its infancy compared to mediums like
films and radio, and it's still a twinkle in its father's eye if you compare it
to books and plays and shit. So when somebody's asked "what are you influences?"
and they're making an 8-bitty 2D platform game, then golly gee willikers it's gonna be Mario and Castlevania and all the crap we've heard
before! Unless they grew up with an Atari ST or a Game.Com or something, we're
unlikely to hear answers that we wouldn't already have guessed.
It's refreshing to read interviews with (comparatively)
vintage game designers, when their influences weren't just other video games,
but from unexpected sources like old
roleplaying books, what they saw in the garden, or loving to see cars get
their
shit wrecked.
All I ask is if you're making a 2D platformer, please keep references to your
influences as modest as possible, and if you're being interviewed, beg them to
ask "tell me something I don't know."
(i'll tell you now if i make a game my ideas will be unoriginal
as hell and glorified expansion packs of games i want more of. when's
Pineapple Smash Crew 2???)